Norway detraction

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Norwegians are fishermen in sheeps' clothing. Their fleets are taking our food, plundering the ocean of the delicious fruits of the seas we so enjoy and need. Since ancient times the Viking ancestors of these maurading madmen have been responsible for killing and eating what only we should rightfully kill and eat.

No wonder that they are on the official PLA Enemies List.

PLA message to Norwegians

This our tenth and final warning this time our non-negotiable ultimatum shall stand, and we really mean it.

If you will not immediately stop catching any and all fish, we will retaliate! PLA flying submarines will desolate your frozen wastelands, and Oslo will become our next testing site in the quest for a truly world-shattering open source nuclear device (after the Redwood tests, that is. See our extensive and ever growning Enemies List)!

Our natural food is fish!

Norwegians, please be aware that you are merely humans, and do not try to pretend that you are something better than creatures who decided that with opposable thumbs and a bit of language, you're better than everyone else! Well, you're not. Ask the cats!

Please note that humans are apes and so your natural food consists of:

  • bananas
  • coconuts
  • leaves
  • other crazy naked big monkeys from neighboring tribes

Therefore, the PLA demands that Norwegians, and by this we mean all of the disruptive, ugly and frankly featherless ape like beings infecting the surface of the planet, cease and desist from eating our fish.

Signed and approved by:

Pen Nguin



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